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ANGRY AT GOD!

Thank you ButterflyMoms for your help especialy Helen for reaching out!

Beautiful ButterflyMoms,

First, I want to thank Helen Bannigan for her wonderful guest post yesterday. It is wonderful to have heart friends like her and those who reached out. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for lightening my burden and giving me a renewed sense of hope!

I find myself in a very precarious part of my life’s journey. For the most part, it does not feel very good to be where I am right now.  If I take the fear and the judgment away I can say that I am definitely experiencing a lot of deep “shifts”. There is a river of rapid, unexpected CHANGE currently re-arranging my life… and that usually does not feel very good to us humans, especially when you seem to be following “the” rules, but not getting the promised results.

I’ve been in a phase where something “icky” happens and I dust myself off,  put on a “stiff upper lip and conjure up all the self-help advice I’ve acquired over the years. Then another “Icky” thing happens, then another, then another, almost like “instead of it’s raining men, it’s raining icky.” It gets so bad that you start to think that the universe is pulling a cruel joke on you. It is seems like your whole life is deconstructing without your conscious consent. You think you are at that bottom and then you arrive at a new lower, bottom. Your life seems to be in free-fall mode. You feel scared, disconnected, and angry.

Life sometimes feel overwhelming!

As someone who has been to third world countries and seen how many/most of the people of our planet Earth live, there is a part of me, THE JUDGE, who rides me like a mule. “Look at you! You have running water, heat, a car that works, healthy children, a body that works, etc…SNAP OUT OF IT! “ And I did,  I did “snap out of it again and again but there is a part of us that we bury when we simply “snap out of it” without acknowledging what is going on because it’s not convenient, or it makes others uncomfortable, or because it does not feel good, or_____________ (you fill in your own answer).

I get the sense that many feel this way but being raised the way we have been it is not “proper” for us to feel “icky” for very long or even simply be ANGRY. Well-wishers and loved ones also tell me to think about all that I have and to be thankful for that. It is true that I do have a lot to be thankful for but sometimes we feel what we feel and cutting off those feelings or sugar-coating what is going on in life, well quite honestly, sometimes life just SUCKS!

I remember back to a time when we had someone from Early Intervention coming to the house when we first had Sophia. Wise, white-haired Barbara was a wonderful soul who came to the house once a week to help us cope with Sophia having Downs and to make the most out of her life. She had a conversation with Doug once that helped snap everything into place. Barbara also had a special needs son who was now a man, she just blurted out one day, “Ya, it sucks.” Just saying those words released Doug in a very deep way. To be able to say that it sucks that you are in that situation without all the KUMBAHYAH fanfare feels REFRESHING! It is acknowledging your true feelings, not what you are supposed to feel.

What does it all mean when it's all falling apart.

It is only when we acknowledge that things do ROYALLY SUCK that we can begin to “move past the sucking”!!! Ignoring it just lets the SUCKINESS grow and fester. It may seem to go away but it only gets nastier and when it finally oozes back into your life you will wish you had addressed it MUCH sooner.

I spent my whole life creating a plan and working that plan of how to avoid pain and have the life I wanted. Over the last few years the universe has completely blown up that world. I AM RAW. Right now my life feels like it’s coming at me full speed. I feel like a rag doll getting thrown around. I don’t know where life is leading me but I will continue to be as authentic and present as I know how. Mark your calendars to come back every Friday for the unfolding journey. Feel free to share your comments below. This is how we can all learn and grow our ButterflyMoms souls.

Great big hugs,

Mariaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

PS  My first book “Entrepreneurial Moms Extraordinaire” is scheduled to be shipped at the end of next week. For ButterflyMoms who order it online it is discounted to $19.99 for ButterflyMoms (down from $25). Please order a copy and recommend to your online friends. Click here to buy, and post the link on your Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, …. http://bit.ly/gRxe4U.

PPS Yesterday we had our first Stitch n’ Bitch at Doug Sent Me Green Cleaners in the downtown of an idyllic New England town called Holliston, Massachusetts. It was sooooo incredibly cathartic. It was so wonderful that the people who came asked if we could do it again in two weeks instead of a month. If you don’t live close enough to Holliston to come Thursday, Feb 3 from 6-8pm then join your own group. Building community is another way we feed our soul. For more information you can go to their official website…. http://stitchnbitch.org/

Let’s Get JEKYLL With IT!

Joy being Joyous!!!

Good morning my Beautiful ButterflyMoms!

I want to give a SHOUT OUT to all the ButterflyDads out there! I actually get almost as many responses from them as I do ButterflyMoms which is AWESOME! I am deeply honored and humbled! Guess that means that we are all drawn to that deep sense of peace 🙂

Where I am the sun is shining, inside and outside. We had a big presentation this morning. My stress level was through the roof. The presentation is now over and went beautifully well. In the afterglow I can see the deep chasm from how very stressed I was and how great I feel now. All that WORRY and ICKY energy was a waste, as most WORRY and ICKY energy is 😉

TRIGGERS, we all have them. SOMEONE or SOMETHING enters your “space”, if you get a CHARGE (REACTION) it means there is a message/lesson/something to pay attention to. Do you listen or do you “kill the messenger”?

Untangling Life's Mysteries Can Be FUN!

We all have sides of light and sides of darkness. There is no light without the dark. Dark balances the light and vice versa. It is not about GOOD or BAD that’s when we start creating LABELS and limiting ourselves. Be on the lookout for when something feels YUMMY or when it feels ICKY. They are there to guide you back into alignment, in other words, YOUR HAPPY PLACE.

When we enter into fear or anger it activates our dark side, our DEFENSE, because we feel UNSAFE. Today, notice when you do this. For me, one of the ways I enter into my defense is that I noticed myself start yelling.  When that happens if I don’t bring awareness to it, the yellling continues or increases. What are you defense triggers? Where do you see this in your own life?

The universe is also communicating with us. It is everywhere and once you start noticing you are going to be amazed at how magical the world is. Think of the story of the werewolf. Do you remember that his DARK SIDE came out when his TRIGGER, the moon, came out. And then there was the story of Doctor Jeckyll and Mr. Hyde….all about the dark side. It’s all around you. Bring up your awareness and play in the world. If you are suffering you are not playing. Choose playing and see how fun the world can be when you embrace BOTH your dark and light sides!

THE Key Ingredient in Being a Mama…..KIDS!

Being in the moment - Chillaxing!!!! 😉

When we are in RAT-RACE MODE we lose our perspective and everything starts blending into one big mess. That is actually a great image if you can go with it. Each time you are in SUPER STRESS MODE all the boundaries of your life begin to fall away and you are left with everything in a big pile.

Think about a fabulous dinner with your favorite appetizer, salad, food, drink and dessert. Mmmmmmm….Can you see it? Can you smell it? Can you taste? Mmmmmmmmm! This is what your life is like when you are:  Grounded, Happy, Breathing, In “What gift does this moment bring?” mode, Present, Noticing, Not Judging, Trusting. You will have some of your best days when you are in this space! It’s always available to you. It’s free. Nothing to do but be YOU! And for each of us our “YOU” feels GREAT!!!

Now when you start: Fearing, Worrying, Not Breathing, Disconnecting from your feelings, Judging others, Judging yourself, Shutting down, Yelling, it’s like you take all that wonderful food and throw it all into a gigantic blender. Mmmmmmmm? How good does that taste? Not so great? But how can that be? It has all your favorite things in it? The answer is that the boundaries are gone. Repeat after me….

🙂 🙂 🙂 Good boundaries = Happy Butterfly Moms!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂

INSPIRATION can come from anywhere! One of our biggest GIFTS as Mothers is our children! No matter how they came into your life, whether through your body or someone else’s they have come into your life for a magical reason. Nothing happens by “accident”.

One of our biggest GIFTS as Mothers is our children! No matter how they came into your life, whether through your body or someone else’s they have come into your life for a magical reason. Nothing happens by “accident” and if filter what is going on RIGHT NOW, in this moment, and ask, What has this come to teach me? then you will unleash the most amazing adventures in this lifetime. The choice, as always, is yours. 🙂

My stepson Christopher’s advocate, Sarah Commerford, came into our office the other day. Sarah was instrumental in getting him evaluated and on the right educational track because she very knowledgeable and a fabulous listener. She has SUCH a wonderful energy about her. She shared that she her son, for years, had been asking her to start cooking food from around the world. Our kids (no matter their age) can see things about us that we might not be able to see. They can be a short of guide if we are open to the messages they bring. Finally one day she decided to do it! She started this amazing blog where she is taking her passion and sharing with others. This is what her blog says…

Sarah Commerford, founder of "What's Cooking in Your World?"

What’s Cooking in your World?

Here is here story… About a year ago, my son Tim asked me if I would cook a meal from a different country at least one night a week. It sounded like a cool idea, as I love to cook and am blessed with a family of adventurous eaters, but like so many other things I think about yet never do, I put the idea on the back burner, so to speak, and pretty much left it there to simmer.

Last night we watched Julia&Julia. When it was over, Timmy said, “Well, if SHE could get through an entire cookbook in 365 days, why couldn’t you make a meal from a different country once a week, huh?” – Hmmm…the little sh*t threw down a challenge!

The Almanac lists 193 countries in the world. Turns out, this is a somewhat dynamic number though, as new countries are continually formed depending on political agendas – usually war. Given that reality, this project will try to reflect our ever changing global map, while doing justice to each country’s regional cuisine. In the process, I hope to expand my world views and cultural insight, one meal at a time.

So here’s my goal: Prepare 1, possibly 2 meals per week from a different country, until I’ve worked my way through all the World’s countries in alphabetical order.

First stop: Afghanistan….To take this adventure created by ButterflyMom Sarah go to http://whatscookinginyourworld.blogspot.com/ It is a wonderful way to support someone’s passion, give yourself and family a wonderful adventure, connect, and ADD DEEP FUN into your HOME!

Remember that old saying that we barely read any more, HAVE YOU HUGGED YOUR CHILD TODAY? Even if they are far away picture them, take a deep breath, and see them for the wonderful messengers they are, even when the message is ICKY right now. This too shall pass, fortunately and unfortunately.

Our Children Have Much to Teach... Are YOU listening?

Come back tomorrow and feed your soul.  You feed your body every day but what are you doing to feed your soul?

Great big hugs,
Mariaaaaaaaaaaaa

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