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My AARP Invitation!….More Proof that the Universe has a Sense of Humor!

Our wonderful computer guru Sam came over tonight to do a little emergency “surgery” on Doug’s iphone. After he was finised he helped me update the time zone setting on ButterflyMoms which was set to Siberia ;). We started talking about time zones and daylight savings and Arizona came up. One of us (probably me) made a comment about their not celebrating Martin Luther King Day and Doug, who reads newspapers like I eat good sushi, said oh they changed that in 1988 so they could hold the Superbowl there…..To this Sam responds, “Oh, that was before I was born.” EVERYTHING IN THE ROOM STOOD STILL……”W-W-W-H-A-T?!” Turns out that he was born in 1989, THE SAME YEAR I GRADUATED FROM BOSTON COLLEGE! (as you can see it really affected me because I’m was writing it in all caps!!! ;))

! First I get an invitation to join AARP for my 43rd birthday two weeks ago, and now this! OK, (deep, cleansing breath!) after things hit us that we did not expect, it’s how we react and HOW we store the memory of the even that propels us forward or holds us back. This just happened so I’m giving it to you LIVE and FRESH so you can see what it really feels like to get back into alignment when the world throws you what looks like a curve ball.

First step is to acknowledge your reaction and how you are feeling. So for me, wow, I felt like I was connecting with someone on an equal basis and just realized I’m TWICE as old as he is! (sound of screeching car ;)) WOW! Keep breathing! Your breath will set you free! :)!

Second step is to ask, “What do I have to learn from this interaction or from making this realization?” “What has this come to teach me?” At first no answers come, and to be honest I start feeling a bit silly because I’m sitting here on my laptop waiting for universe/my subconscious/God/Buddha/my Guardian Angel(s), basically,whoever is answering, to answer. When I let go, the answer comes very softly at first, and when I invite it in, it begins to build in color and the story unfolds before me. The answer in this situation, for me, is simple. I’ve been working on getting the Oprah Show a 3 minute video. It’s something important to me and I’ve spent a lot of time on it (both productive and worry energy too). The message that just came to me was that I have lots of experience, in this case, two decades worth that I’m not acknowledging. Having this interaction is like a grounding, gently reminding me that I’m prepared for whatever adventures await. Living in the land of “what if’s” and/or fear does not serve our highest good. Period.

The third step is to review what the answer is. Try it on and see if it fits. NOW, here is a caviat….if it’s a very big lesson you may have received the “right” meaning but it might not fit for you because it’s could just be too much for you to handle at that moment in time. Wherever you are is where you are “supposed” to be, so just let it go. Look for a meaning that fits YOU right where you are NOW. When you do, it feels wonderful. You feel seen, heard and understood. The universe is always talking to you, ready to guide you to your highest good. I invite you leave space in your day each day this week to start hearing your intuition, because, simply put, that is how we are guided.

Remember to come back tomorrow to feed your soul and invite some friends to come along too! The more the merrier, truly!

Great big hugs,

Mariaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

Lessons Learned INSIDE HARRY POTTER’s CLOSET!

Our New England home from 1870

We live in a great house that was built in 1870 so it has a lot of very cool nooks and crannies :). I’m actually writing to you today from one of those cool places! Yup, it’s true! In my daughters’ bedroom there are two closets, one of them is what we call the Harry Potter closet because that is exactly what it looks like. It runs the whole length of the room, and has two built-in shelving units and a very long clothes bar for hanging clothes. It’s huge! Why am I writing from in here you may ask? Well, since I’ve started writing this blog on a daily basis things have greatly shifted for me. You know, stuff like the Oprah Show calling me!! (YIPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!) I still think that is sooooooooo amazing! But I digress. 

A very large SHIFT started when I LET GO of Farmville. (For those who are not familiar with Farmville it is a game on Facebook.) I had not realized, really realized, that it was taking me slowly away from my life in such a way that I was literally sacrificing sleep and time with my kids to “tend to my imaginary farm”. It comes soooo innocently. The little digital puppies and baby animals are sooooooo CUTE. It was only a matter of time before I got really hooked because I was using it to escape the ICKY parts of my day….you know that nasty TO DO LIST that never seems to END! Ya, that!

My fantabulous coach suggested that I stop playing for a week and I said, “Sure, no problem.” She said that was not the reaction she wanted so how about I just BLOW UP the game. ‘WHAT!? You mean like destroy it?” I said in shock. She responded with, “Now that, that response is what I was looking for! Yes, destroy it.” Well I got my computer guy out there within the next hour and he destroyed all my virtual puppies, chickens, Japanese pagoda (it was a very cool farm ;)), adobe, cows, barns, crops, etc. You know what? I did not miss it one bit. Not at all, plus I started attracting some very cool life events!

"Vovo" comes to the help!

That got me thinking. What else am I holding on to in my life that is not serving me and my goal to BE THE FIRE THAT IGNITES PEOPLES’ SOULS? The answer came, but I did not want to hear it. It’s my stuff. I am drowning in “STUFF”. Oh yes, yes, “STUFF”, just like Farmville, can be very INNOCENT looking at first, a cute handbag here, a turkey fryer for Father’s day over there and pretty soon the show HOARDERS is calling you because your youngest offspring ratted you out. 😉

So I started with my fridge as I wrote about in yesterday’s blog entry. It was soooooooo wonderfully cathartic that all week I had planned to spend this weekend “doing” the girls’ bedroom. They have soooooooo many clothes (think four girls) from NEWBORN to Size 10 – (you see I like to plan ahead – my oldest girl is only 6! 😉 Even though my mom came to help yesterday (THANKS MAEZINHA!!!) for four hours, and I also worked for four hours today, and we packed up SEVEN trash bags full of clothes to give away, I still have another closet in there room to go through! Oh, there is no way it’s going to happen today, dear ButterflyMoms, but it was from this spot that I wanted to write today’s blog so I could be IN THE MOMENT in every sense of the word. It’s like writing from within the lesson! Pretty cool! I love that I have the ability to unleash my creativity here in the ButterflyMoms blog! Thank you for giving me that glorious gift! WOW, this feels FABULOUS!

So back to “STUFF”. I have the need to start getting rid of mine. People buy stuff to fill holes they feel in themselves. I want to by whole-y NOT hole-y 😉 (there’s that creativity running amok again! 😉 I will continue following my instinct after I’m done with the girls’ bedroom – I KNOW MY closet is next. It is not as bad as there’s so hopefully it will go a lot faster! There is only one of me, but being pregnant five times in five years does make things on your body SHIFT a bit too….the other day didn’t we talk about great shifts happening?! Well now we know where part of that shift happened, right? 😉

Check in with yourself. After reading this how do you feel about the items in your____________ (fill in the blank for YOU). See if you get inspired to donate some of your items too!

Thanks for coming by today and FEEDING YOUR SOUL! Come back EVERY DAY and bring a friend! We are now almost up to 800 people a week reading this blog! OH YA!!!! THANK YOU! I hope you feel the LOVE!!!!

Great BIG hugs!

Mariaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

PS There is a great online site called www.FREECYCLE.org. It allows people to ask for OR give away stuff they don’t want FOR FREE. There are groups all over the world. If there is not one in your area start one. It basically runs itself and is an amazing way to keep things out of landfills and bond a community! I will be putting the bags of clothes up there for MOMS and DADS who need and/or want them. Another step towards making the world a BETTER place!  YAY!!!!!!<

Are you Suffering from Anorexia of the SOUL?

Yesterday’s blog brought examples of some of the vast changes that are going on in our world. There are many, many shifts. Even with all these changes most of us currently live in a world where we are completely STARVING OUR SOULS!

PEEK A BOO! I SEE ME! DO YOU SEE YOU?

Think about it. What is your life based on, really? What is it based on? For many of us we live in an unconscious fog. We only really wake up when something NOTICEABLE happens like a death of someone or something, or an accident or illness. Otherwise, we completely alter our behavior and cut out our intuition to fit within the rules. 

At work most of us do whatever the company/boss tells us we have to do, even when we don’t like it. Let’s say they pay you $200,000/year. Although most of us make significantly less than that, let’s go with that number because it round and big. For that amount of money (or a  lot less) you give your power to a person/group of people who tell you how you will structure your time. When you will work, when you can have “off”, when you can be with your kids. Some even let you know when you can go to the bathroom or take a break. This is sooooooo widespread that people don’t even realize that it’s happening. They feel ICKY but they don’t know why………so off to Dunkin Donuts we go to get something caffeinated and sugary to help us make it through the day, right!

Most just follow along because that is just what everyone does. If you don’t then you are weird and sometimes it even gets you fired so make sure you fit into their box, ok? (breathe with me!) I know this is hard for some of you and some might even get angry but stay with it and see where it takes you. You are safe.

I hope you kindly allow me to share this little example…I once asked one of my brothers if he wanted to go to Europe with me. I had found CRAZY CHEAP airline tickets and had a FREE place to stay. He said, “I’d love to but I have no more vacation time.” Now for most people that sounds “normal” but think about it. “WORK” takes us the best hours of your day and the best days of your life.

Most of us tolerate where we work, what we do or both. (Breathe) How does that feel for you? I can hear your mind coming into the conversation already (because mine is too 😉 I’m not saying quit tomorrow, or even ever. I’m gently suggesting you bring your awareness to your situation. Is this how you want to live having to ask permission to do the things you want when you want to do them? (Feel the answer.)  How does it feel for you? Even if it feel ICKY stay with it. Use your breath. It is there to help you process stuff. No breathing. No moving through stuff. It’s that simple!

For a simple experiment stand on a major street at rush hour (morning or night) and look at the faces of the people commuting to work. How do they look? Are they feeding their souls? Are you feeding yours? If you find that you are feeling an ICKY here AWESOME! Go with it! You know that most of the people who are going to work look like they are super psyched right! They look happy and excited that they are going to “WORK”! WHEW WHO! YA! YES! YIPEE! YAHOEY!!! And driving home from work, even better, right? They are happy to have spent a precious day of their lives living with purpose, making a difference and doing what feels right to them…right? Right? Oh,….no?  We all know it’s the opposite. 🙁 Again that Beatles song, “All the lonely people, where do they all come from?”

These people, like many of us, are suffering from ANOREXIA OF THE SOUL. We have starved our souls by ignoring them, by pushing them down when they popped up because it was socially unacceptable at the time. We made ourseleves small to fit in. We have learned to do that all our lives and then we wonder why drink, smoke, cheat, shop, eat…..(pick your poison). It’s because we miss ourselves! We act like we are human who occasionally have spiritual experience when in reality it’s the opposite. We are spirits/energy having a human experience!

What are some of your signs that you are suffering from Anorexia of the Soul? To have a better life, you have to start with AWARENESS, anything else is just a Band-Aid.

A gentle reminder that each time you come to www.ButterflyMoms.com you are feeding your soul! You are acknowledging it and asking what it needs. The voice might be very faint for some of you but keep at it. Your soul wants to talk to you. It wants you HAPPY! Just like with Aladin and the lamp, you are its master!

Some people don’t want to take the journey for fear of pain. Well, look around and ask is the pain of not being my TRUE me worth this feeling of constantly treading water? Don’t worry. Wherever you are is exactly where you are supposed to be! Because YOU are reading this perhaps you are ready for something a bit more…..oh, I don’t know…something a little bit more YOU?!

Great big hugs,
Mariaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

PS Today we got 153 people to the site. AMAZING! One ButterflyMom Vice President told me she has changed her homepage to be the ButterflyMoms.com so she can start her day with the intention of feeding her soul. WHAT AN HONOR!! Keep spreading the word! Keep exploring YOU because YOU are THE most interesting person you will EVER meet! 🙂

START WHERE YOU ARE…

Enjoying the simple things with Family - Three generations on both sides pictured here!

Sometimes it seems like life if not going our way. We get bored, tired, sick, cranky, angry, feisty……etcetera, etcetera, etcetera. When you feel that way, you are getting fabulous feeback. NOTHING is ever “good” or “bad” like most of us have fallen into the habit of labeling. The key is to NOTICE what you are feeling. I wrote something about this yesterday but the message is still wanting to come out so lets continue that fabulous life lesson shall we….

There are signs guiding us EVERYWHERE we look. Sometimes we don’t like the sign so we simply ignore it. We truly think that the issue will go away, but it just shifts. The sign gets bigger. We ignore it bigger. The sign gets huge. We ignore it huge. Then comes the bohemoth sign! (enter music…DUM DUM DUHHHHM!) There is usually no ignoring this one, even for the best of us! It usually takes years to recover from it, many never do.

WHAT HAPPENED? When we get super self-absorbed in our little made-up worlds we forget to connect with what is real, our feelings. They are our compass. When you try to override the system you get ridden over  :)! (“ridden” is that even a word? Well, it is now!!! 😉 ) The universe does not discriminate. Take a look at gravity. Does not care if you are old, new, young, old, rich, poor, male, female. NOPE! It just does it’s thing. We are in the same situation. The universe works in the same way. Learn the rules and you can build the life you want. It’s that simple.

Happy, Grumpy and Smiley

We as human beings have been evolving in many different ways. Spiritually, we are all moving into a time of great learning. If you are noticing what is around you, you will most likely see that people are doing lots of “shifting”. For example, people who are doing YOGA you would never in a million years think they would. Others might be leaving a long work or marriage situation to follow another dream. People are moving to a different street, town, state or country. Notice. More people are becoming massage therapists and healers. Becoming a doctor, engineer or attorney does not have the same Uhhhhh-Ahhhh! it once had.

A HUGE shift has been how close many fathers have become to their sons and daughters as opposed to when we were growing up. At that time most dads did not know their children at all because work was the main focus. Many children who grew up in that fatherless world did not want to have the same relationship with their kids.

Moms’ roles have shifted too. In my own house, since I started writing EVERY day it fills my soul. My husband Doug has really stepped up by helping take on some of the responsibilities I had. We did not talk about it, he just started doing it. That act of love on his part makes it a lot easier to write! Because writing fills my soul, I’m much more present and joyous with him and the kids. It feels wonderful and the kids have less tantrums….imagine that!  😉

What happens when you don’t eat all day? CRANKY!!!!! Well then, WHEN was the last time you fed your soul? Hmmmm? Keep thinking. Keep thinking. If you are now going back into memories from the 1900’s, you, my dear, are STARVING!!! Your soul is STARVING!

Tomorrow we will talk about what is the best way to feed your soul. come back tomorrow for your REAL SOUL FOOD RECIPES!!!

Great big hugs,

Mariaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

Let’s Get JEKYLL With IT!

Joy being Joyous!!!

Good morning my Beautiful ButterflyMoms!

I want to give a SHOUT OUT to all the ButterflyDads out there! I actually get almost as many responses from them as I do ButterflyMoms which is AWESOME! I am deeply honored and humbled! Guess that means that we are all drawn to that deep sense of peace 🙂

Where I am the sun is shining, inside and outside. We had a big presentation this morning. My stress level was through the roof. The presentation is now over and went beautifully well. In the afterglow I can see the deep chasm from how very stressed I was and how great I feel now. All that WORRY and ICKY energy was a waste, as most WORRY and ICKY energy is 😉

TRIGGERS, we all have them. SOMEONE or SOMETHING enters your “space”, if you get a CHARGE (REACTION) it means there is a message/lesson/something to pay attention to. Do you listen or do you “kill the messenger”?

Untangling Life's Mysteries Can Be FUN!

We all have sides of light and sides of darkness. There is no light without the dark. Dark balances the light and vice versa. It is not about GOOD or BAD that’s when we start creating LABELS and limiting ourselves. Be on the lookout for when something feels YUMMY or when it feels ICKY. They are there to guide you back into alignment, in other words, YOUR HAPPY PLACE.

When we enter into fear or anger it activates our dark side, our DEFENSE, because we feel UNSAFE. Today, notice when you do this. For me, one of the ways I enter into my defense is that I noticed myself start yelling.  When that happens if I don’t bring awareness to it, the yellling continues or increases. What are you defense triggers? Where do you see this in your own life?

The universe is also communicating with us. It is everywhere and once you start noticing you are going to be amazed at how magical the world is. Think of the story of the werewolf. Do you remember that his DARK SIDE came out when his TRIGGER, the moon, came out. And then there was the story of Doctor Jeckyll and Mr. Hyde….all about the dark side. It’s all around you. Bring up your awareness and play in the world. If you are suffering you are not playing. Choose playing and see how fun the world can be when you embrace BOTH your dark and light sides!

Anyone Up for A QUICKIE?

EVERY person who comes into your life is there to remind you of parts of who you are. Even the ICKIES ones (not pictured here) are gifts. Treasure them!

One of the things I hear the most in my practice of helping ButterflyMoms is, “I wish life came with instructions.” Well, life does not come with instructions but it does come with something MUCH better, INSTANT FEEDBACK. Can you imagine if life did come with instructions and you had to memorize? As they say in Brooklyn, “Foh-git-about it!” 😉 This way is MUCH easier!

So when you feel stressed. Pay attention. When you feel tired. Pay attention. When you feel ICKY pay attention. Use breath. (take one now for practice 😉

If you move closer to your joy you start feeling good. If you move away from alignment you start feeling ICKY.(TAKE A BIG BREATH AND TAKE IT IN. YOU REMEMBER THINGS BETTER WHEN YOU DO THAT. We could all use a bit more O2 in our diets! ;))

And just a quick side note for those, like me, who like to think OUTSIDE the box…this means “FEEL GOOD” without having to do or put anything inside your body. If you are dependent on an outside source, well then, it’s not YOU! BE LEAD BY YOUR BLISS, not the chocolate’s!!!! 😉

Today’s post is short and sweet after yesterday’s. Sometimes we need a QUICKIE to just re-align ourselves back to our IN THE ZONE place!

GO CELTICS! 😉

Great big hugs,

Mariaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

PS We have had over 1,000 people come to the blog in the last 3 weeks!!! WOW! I love to hear from you! Many people write to me but do it privately and don’t post on the blog. Feel free to do what feels right to you just make sure you send me your suggestions so we help each other grow in a direction that serves. YOU are LOVE and YOU are LOVED!!

How’s Your GAS????

Good Morning Beautiful ButterflyMoms!!

What helps us on our journey is to know, or be reminded, of what we already have. Today let’s talk about something that affects your days in the most profound way, ENERGY.

ENERGY is the fuel for everything you do. You can have the nicest car in the world, like a Lamborghini pictured here on the right, but without gas, over time,  it’s just a candidate for the junk yard. Think about that for a second. Our energy is key! It’s an obvious point, so obvious that we forget about it! Your car has several warning mechanisms. It has the gas gage that tells you how much gas you have. For some of us we ride with the WARNING: GAS ALMOST EMPTY light on because we have gotten pretty good at guesstimating how many trips we can take without having to re-fuel. Sound familiar? 😉

Mothers can go a lot longer than a car without gas, a lot longer, sometimes years. In a way I’m proud to write that. I think that’s the ego. The “I can take on the world no matter what”, part of me. The challenge is that while you are in that mode you are closing down your JUST BEING mode. This is when we start to feel STUCK and then start spiraling into our favorite defensive coping strategies like watching more TV or eating more. Sound familiar? :0)

This week use your car as a reminder that every time you check the gas you also also check in with yourself to see if you are getting enough sleep, nutritious foods, play/creative time, connecting with others who fill your soul time. If the answer is no then right then and there pull out your calendar and find a fifteen minute time slots that day that you can get to play with two of those things above. Call a heart friend. Walk your dog. On the way from picking your kids up from school take them to the park for 15 minutes. It might sound like not that big of a deal but when you do it it unleashes some serious FUN that will shift a lot of what is not working in your life! Try it. You might just LOVE it

Come back tomorrow for some more fun ENERGY information sharing!

Have fun playing in the world!

Great big hugs,

Mariaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

THE Key Ingredient in Being a Mama…..KIDS!

Being in the moment - Chillaxing!!!! 😉

When we are in RAT-RACE MODE we lose our perspective and everything starts blending into one big mess. That is actually a great image if you can go with it. Each time you are in SUPER STRESS MODE all the boundaries of your life begin to fall away and you are left with everything in a big pile.

Think about a fabulous dinner with your favorite appetizer, salad, food, drink and dessert. Mmmmmmm….Can you see it? Can you smell it? Can you taste? Mmmmmmmmm! This is what your life is like when you are:  Grounded, Happy, Breathing, In “What gift does this moment bring?” mode, Present, Noticing, Not Judging, Trusting. You will have some of your best days when you are in this space! It’s always available to you. It’s free. Nothing to do but be YOU! And for each of us our “YOU” feels GREAT!!!

Now when you start: Fearing, Worrying, Not Breathing, Disconnecting from your feelings, Judging others, Judging yourself, Shutting down, Yelling, it’s like you take all that wonderful food and throw it all into a gigantic blender. Mmmmmmmm? How good does that taste? Not so great? But how can that be? It has all your favorite things in it? The answer is that the boundaries are gone. Repeat after me….

🙂 🙂 🙂 Good boundaries = Happy Butterfly Moms!!! 🙂 🙂 🙂

INSPIRATION can come from anywhere! One of our biggest GIFTS as Mothers is our children! No matter how they came into your life, whether through your body or someone else’s they have come into your life for a magical reason. Nothing happens by “accident”.

One of our biggest GIFTS as Mothers is our children! No matter how they came into your life, whether through your body or someone else’s they have come into your life for a magical reason. Nothing happens by “accident” and if filter what is going on RIGHT NOW, in this moment, and ask, What has this come to teach me? then you will unleash the most amazing adventures in this lifetime. The choice, as always, is yours. 🙂

My stepson Christopher’s advocate, Sarah Commerford, came into our office the other day. Sarah was instrumental in getting him evaluated and on the right educational track because she very knowledgeable and a fabulous listener. She has SUCH a wonderful energy about her. She shared that she her son, for years, had been asking her to start cooking food from around the world. Our kids (no matter their age) can see things about us that we might not be able to see. They can be a short of guide if we are open to the messages they bring. Finally one day she decided to do it! She started this amazing blog where she is taking her passion and sharing with others. This is what her blog says…

Sarah Commerford, founder of "What's Cooking in Your World?"

What’s Cooking in your World?

Here is here story… About a year ago, my son Tim asked me if I would cook a meal from a different country at least one night a week. It sounded like a cool idea, as I love to cook and am blessed with a family of adventurous eaters, but like so many other things I think about yet never do, I put the idea on the back burner, so to speak, and pretty much left it there to simmer.

Last night we watched Julia&Julia. When it was over, Timmy said, “Well, if SHE could get through an entire cookbook in 365 days, why couldn’t you make a meal from a different country once a week, huh?” – Hmmm…the little sh*t threw down a challenge!

The Almanac lists 193 countries in the world. Turns out, this is a somewhat dynamic number though, as new countries are continually formed depending on political agendas – usually war. Given that reality, this project will try to reflect our ever changing global map, while doing justice to each country’s regional cuisine. In the process, I hope to expand my world views and cultural insight, one meal at a time.

So here’s my goal: Prepare 1, possibly 2 meals per week from a different country, until I’ve worked my way through all the World’s countries in alphabetical order.

First stop: Afghanistan….To take this adventure created by ButterflyMom Sarah go to http://whatscookinginyourworld.blogspot.com/ It is a wonderful way to support someone’s passion, give yourself and family a wonderful adventure, connect, and ADD DEEP FUN into your HOME!

Remember that old saying that we barely read any more, HAVE YOU HUGGED YOUR CHILD TODAY? Even if they are far away picture them, take a deep breath, and see them for the wonderful messengers they are, even when the message is ICKY right now. This too shall pass, fortunately and unfortunately.

Our Children Have Much to Teach... Are YOU listening?

Come back tomorrow and feed your soul.  You feed your body every day but what are you doing to feed your soul?

Great big hugs,
Mariaaaaaaaaaaaa

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