Subscribe to Receive FREE Life/Coaching Business Tips!

Today Would Have Been Her 12th Birthday…

Fenway Park a week before about a week after Sophia’s first birthday.

Beautiful ‘Coach Me Maria’ Yummy Heart,

Every May 12 is different. Some are celebrations. Some are uneventful. Some are sad. Some just slip by… This one SUCKS, in fact, it’s been sucking for weeks now. The heart-wrenching sadness, I thought time would take care of, has had a resurgence this year. I’ve been crying for weeks so much so that my eyelids might be in a permanent state of puffy. Why? Well, it’s partly the deplorable state of the world… partly that even babies on this planet die… mostly because I wish I could bring her back.

Our beautiful our beloved Sophia died suddenly on June 22, 2006 for physical reasons no one, even today, understands. It was completely unexpected. It gutted us. It was extra hard because our little girl had just joyously celebrated her first birthday!

What a GLORIOUS day that was! Sophia was the happiest kid and it was super easy to fall in love with her. She had Downs and that just brought her level of LOVE to a whole new level. IT WAS SOOOOOO AWESOME TO BE AROUND THAT KIND OF LOVE! People literally came from all over the world for her birthday! Her life was a HUGE CELEBRATION… a month later Sophia lay dead in our arms. This can be such a cruel planet! A total gut punch that seems to revisit me whenever the mood strikes it. It leaves me heartbroken and in pieces.

Quite honestly, I am sick of crying. Occasionally I blocked the crying because what’s the use? Will it bring Sophia back???? After a while it’s just plain depressing and quite honestly lonely. Dead babies. Who wants to talk about that? And who wants to be around you when you are that sad? To be honest, the answer is not a lot of people. I am tired of hiding my feelings because people are so very uncomfortable about death, especially a baby’s death. They don’t know what to say. Many avoid us. They think we are “weird.” The reality is, they are right. It’s true. We are! When your child suddenly dies something in you shifts… in “icky” ways… but also in “magical” ones.

I realize I’m not honoring anyone by focusing on the icky so I begin looking for other ways to give meaning to Sophia’s amazing life. Parents often find ways to honor their beloved’s child life… like create a scholarship, dedicate a bench or start a race/event in that person’s honor… These did not feel like things that would honor Sophia’s short life.

I DID NOT FIND IT… IT FOUND ME!… (Actually it STALKED me!)
Way before Sophia was born I had been an international business and life coach. After her death I became a different kind of coach. I started channeling… and processing some AMAZING information having to do with our energy body, which most people know almost NOTHING about. It’s the kind of information that people so desperately need right now. As I say in my book Finally FULL Of Yourself: Unlocking Your Spiritual DNA “Pain is part of life, suffering is optional.”

For almost ten years, my way of honoring Sophia was to write a blog. That blog was seen by Oprah Show producers and that was one of the reasons I got to be on two Oprah Shows! People were so very inspired by the blog that I kept writing. Every Friday for five years I wrote through pregnancies, temper tantrums, snow storms, clients, miscarriages, broker exams, arguments, business meetings, breast feedings, vacations… At first it took me the whole day to do the blog. By the end I could write a really powerful one within 20 minutes. Isn’t it amazing what happens when we FOCUS?

I wrote NO MATTER WHAT, because it was my sacred time to be with Sophia. I felt I could honor her, by helping others. It felt indescribably amazing when people, even total strangers, would write and say that what I had written changed their life. Breath-giving!

From all that writing came a calling to write a book. I was really bad at that too at first… So bad that I burned the first, second and third fully written manuscripts I had written, because they were not in alignment with the magical connection I have with Sophia… Finally, after 10 years in November of 2016… just days after the election, Finally FULL Of Yourself: Unlocking Your Spiritual DNA was unleashed into the world! It is the book that was calling to me!

For 10 years, I could not understand why it took so very long for the book to “come” but when it came out just days after the shocking election of the 45th president of the United States, I knew that everything is indeed divine… even when it does not make sense to us! Finally FULL Of Yourself: Unlocking Your Spiritual DNA captures the love vibration that Sophia and I still share. It’s a gift to the world downloaded here by me… an accidental writer with a big, sensitive heart and a geeky personality. #geeksunite #scienceisreal

This life is ugly, very ugly… but it is also magical. When we get stuck in the ugly… we live the the curse side. When we are able to shift our focus, we can live out the gift. That is the core definition of happiness.

Look, let’s be clear… happiness is not a straight line. Ugly still happens. Ugly will never not happen. It’s a part of this planet but it does not mean I have to move in! Each day I feel what I feel and remember to choose my focus. I invite you today to do the same. Take a moment… especially when the UGLY hits… and CHOOSE.

So today as I am reminded that I GET TO CHOOSE THE GIFT… I suddenly realize as I write this that this is the first birthday that the book Finally FULL Of Yourself: Unlocking Your Spiritual DNA is done… not almost… or just another re-write… or just one more round of edits… but DONE, DONE, DONE!!!

This is not about a product, it’s about a legacy. It’s a tool that helps people realize why they bothered to get a body in the first place! Countless people have told me how much the book is making a difference in their lives!

It makes my heart sing for joy to know that each time someone buys, recommends, gifts, opens, underlines, remembers, quotes, shares, reviews, learns, posts, lends, orders Finally FULL Of Yourself: Unlocking Your Spiritual DNA the LOVE VIBRATION on Mother Earth grows just a wee bit more! (That’s why I’m always writing LOVE RISING in my posts!)

Took this birthday photo this morning. We have this butterfly gate in front of our house in honor of our sweet girl Sophalicious!

I feel the information in the book is my way I’m honoring Sophia. In her name, I get to help make the world a better place one heart at a time. It’s sometimes ugly/messy work but so well worth it!

This weekend is also Mother’s Day in the States (last weekend in Europe)… and I could not think of a better post that this one to share with you. When I started it I had no idea where it was going… (I’m getting better at surrendering to what shows up) … but it ended in LOVE! HAPPY MOTHER’s DAY!

Happy Birthday Beautiful Sophia! I THANK YOU from the bottom of my heart for choosing me to be your mamã. I LOVE YOU with all my heart! Beijinhos amor! Parabens!

Weirdmaste,                                                           Mariaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa de Lourdes Cerveira Salomão-Schmidt www.coachmemaria.com                                                                            The birthday girl’s mamã  🙂

HOW YOU CAN HELP…

HELP SPREAD SOPHIA’s LOVE… I turn 50 on May 29th and I have a goal to get at least 50 Amazon reviews for Finally FULL Of Yourself: Unlocking Your Spiritual DNA. Guess what?! We’re up to 42!

GROW THE LOVE by leaving your review. It’s super easy!… https://www.amazon.com/Finally-Full-Yourself-Unlocking-Spiritual/product-reviews/0998191213/ref=cm_cr_dp_d_ttl?ie=UTF8&reviewerType=all_reviews&sortBy=recent#R1T2S8B9VMNRHZ

 

Where to buy Finally FULL Of Yourself: Unlocking Your Spiritual DNA…

ONLINE

  • Amazon… https://www.amazon.com/dp/0998191213/ref=rdr_ext_tmb
  • Barnes & Noble… http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/finally-full-of-yourself-maria-salom-o-schmidt/1125253329?ean=9780998191218

IN STORES

  • Barnes & Noble or any bookstore… Call to pre-order. Takes about 2-3 days.

IN MASSACHUSETTS…

  • Cambridge… The Harvard Bookstore  
  • Holliston… Coffee Haven and Fiske’s General Store 
  • Medfield… Holistic Wellness Center 
  • Medway… TC Scoops and The Enchanted Fox 
  • Natick… Five Crows 
  • Newton… Boston College Bookstore                                                                             
  • Walpole… She Breathes 

If you have a favorite local bookstore suggest they carry it. I’d love, love, love to come do a book signing and/or workshop at your local bookstore!

This is a grassroots LOVE MOVEMENT that only grows when you spread the word.

Read it! Review it! Share it!

LOVE RISING!

WHERE’S YOUR HEAD?

Feedback is ALWAYS appreciated!LOVE to know that you were here! It feeds my soul! :)!

Good Morning Beautiful ButterflyMoms!

This morning at 5:03 a.m. my seven-year-old daughter, Mialotta, came downstairs crying from a nightmare she had just had. She does not often have them and this one was a doozy. Initially the more I tried to get her to share what she had seen, the more she resisted. It kind of felt like when you are dealing with a tick, the more you pull to get it off, the more it DIGS IN. Hmmmm… So I had to unearth her ickies in a different way. ACTIVATE INTUITION!

First, I had to get her back to her thinking mode. I took many parenting classes with the wonderful child expert Ellen Kerstein who teaches Conscious Discipline workshops. Ellen taught us that when kids (or adults 😉 are having temper tantrums they are COMPLETELY in their brain stem. This is the part of the oldest part of brain (evolutionarily-speaking) where there is no speech. It is all about survival. It is your fight or flight mode. We know someone is in this space when you try to talk to them and they seem to not hear a word you are saying. This is where we as parents are most likely to lose our cool. 🙁 Just so you know, there is absolutely NO WAY to communicate with a child that is in this place. Knowing this little fact helps us be able to RESOLVE, instead of thinking the child is being….(fill in the blank) a) bratty  b) spoiled  c) disrespectful  d) whatever feeling comes up for you.

The best way is to help your child get back to her pre-frontal lobes, the problem-solving part of the brain. This is done through touching and speaking in a soothing voice. Today I rubbed the bottoms of her feet (helps her ground too), held her in my lap and rubbed her back. I could physically see her relax. While I was doing this I was speaking to her. I asked her questions, most of which she initially asked me to repeat because she was so deep into her brain stem. It is all information. If you JUDGE IT you label it. Once you label something you no longer receive information. You ASS-U-ME. (Sound familiar? 😉

All these activities move her into the part of her brain that allows her to CREATE CHOICE. CHOICE is what guides our lives. It is the choice of what we focus on that gives us more of “that”. As you go about your day check in with yourself and see what part of your brain are you in. Notice especially when you are in your brain stem and wondering why you cannot solve the issue at hand.

Here is to a fantastic day! Please read the updates and event below. They also feed your soul! :)!

Big honkin’ hugs,

Mariaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

MORE WAYS TO FEED YOUR SOUL…

√  THIS THURSDAY, September 22 from 12-2pm, I will be speaking at the DreamFactory Luncheon. The topic is IGNITE YOUR BIGGEST DREAM! at the delicious Bella Costa restaurant (147 Cochituate Rd, Framingham). Lunch for 1st time attendees to the DreamFactory Community is only $25 (the lunch is VERY yummy!) This is a wonderful community…Space is limited so please sign up early to reserve your spot. It would be soooooooo awesome to see you there! To sign up NOW CLICK… http://www.cantorconsulting.com/Programs/tabid/298/CategoryID/68/Default.aspx

√  It will be here before you know it so sign up now. Do your New Year’s Resolution Early! Take care of yourself! October 21-23 you have a date with yourself in Vermont at the beautiful Lareau Farm Inn for the first ever ButterflyMoms Fall Retreat! Price is only $299 if you pay before October 15, after that it goes up to $365 which includes all the workshops, materials, most meals and lodging. There are a very limited number of spots so don’t be on the outside wishing you had booked it! We have gotten a number of requests for spots so reserve your spot now!! YOU WILL ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT! TALK ABOUT REJUVINATING YOUR SOUL! WOW! To book it send an email to maria@butterflymoms.com! Scholarships available. You will only regret NOT going!

This week’s ButterflyMoms updates…

*Just finished our 16th week in a row of ButterflyMoms Workshops!!!!! Next week we are having a special guest, the amazing Marianne Sage. You can read more about her at her site… http://www.crystalsinger.webs.com/index.html She’ll share her passion and wisdom about how crystals are formed and how they work. She will bring lots of them with her. Some will even be for sale if you want to take one home. 🙂 Don’t miss out on all the fun…Come next Thurs, September 22nd at 8pm!  783 Washington St, Holliston. Plenty of FREE & EASY PARKING in back. Only $25 or just $20 if pay through Paypal http://bit.ly/mS7c70

*We sold one ENTREPRENEUR MOM EXTRAORDINAIRE book this week. Thank you to the mystery person who bought one at Brick House Realty! Until I find out who you are I will put that you are from Holliston!! :)! See the cool list of all the countries and states where people have bought books at the end of this blog. To feed the soul of a friend buy them a copy by CLICKING HERE NOW… http://bit.ly/gRxe4U

* On the 10th anniversary of 9-11 we held our first ever ButterflyMoms Healing Share. We had about 30 people including kids…they are the ones who really get this stuff! We even had a 93 year old who had never done anything like this but said, “Hey this feels pretty good!” How cool is that? We collected about nine bags of groceries and will be delivering it to the Holliston Food Pantry this week!  THANK YOU TO EVERYONE WHO DONATED THEIR TIME, SPACE, TABLES, FOOD and LOVE!

*Did eight more Reiki/Full Spectrum healings this past week. To book a healing send an email with times you are available to maria@butterflymoms.com! Cost is $60 for a session.

 

THE BOOK… “Mom Entrepreneur Extraordinaire”

The following is a list of places where ButterflyMoms live who bought our wonderful book MOM ENTREPRENEUR EXTRAORDINAIRE… Buy one so you can put your city/town/country on the list like so many other beautiful ButterflyMoms have!

UNITED STATES

California

Anaheim 1

Fullerton 1

Sacramento 1

San Bruno 1

Connecticut

Greenwich 1

Yalesville 1

Florida

Fort Lauderdale 1

Kentucky

Louisville 1

Maryland

Chestertown 1

Massachusetts

Ashland 2

Bolton 1

Holliston 14

Hudson 4

Medway 3

North Easton 1

Sherborn 1

South Grafton 1

Watertown 1

Worcester 3

Wrentham

Missouri

Lee’s Summit 1

New York

Scarsdale 1

Stony Brook 1

Ohio

Dublin 1

Rhode Island

Newport 1

Vermont

Waitsville (Mad River Valley) 2

AUSTRIA

Wien, Austria 2

IRELAND

Dublin, Ireland 1

ITALY

Rome, Italy 3

JAPAN

Tokyo  1

PORTUGAL

Santa Maria (Azores/Açores)  1

SCOTLAND     

Greenock

SPAIN

Madrid 1

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

*To buy your copy Click here now…http://bit.ly/gRxe4U

REMEMBER…

*Mark your calendar to read ButterflyMoms EVERY Friday!

*Share the ButterflyMoms blog with your beloved friends! Spread the love!  www.butterflymoms.com

NOW HIT the “Like” button below: because you can!   🙂

Bigger Boobies, Getting Approval and Chasing The Dream

Dearest Beautiful ButterflyMoms,

First some housekeeping issues…

*My motherboard is still in Wisconsin getting fixed…with manuscripts of my next two books and I’m still going through my 8,000 emails from when I could not access my computer. If you sent me an email and I did not respond please don’t take it personally, I could only access emails through an iPhone and it was impossible for me to do that with such a high volume of emails. Shifting through them now.

*The www.butterflymoms.com website is still a work in progress. Thank you for bearing with me as right now the blogs are not all there and it makes it a bit tricky to read prior blogs (for those who want to really experience how very amazing this journey has been). It will get better. For right now it is what it is. ;)…Gentle reminder again to SURRENDER! 😉

Now let’s enter into the heart of today’s ButterflyMoms blog….As you enter today’s blog I offer a gentle reminder to take eight super-deep BREATHS! 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7 aaaaaand………..8! AHHHHHHHHHHH! Breathing makes the journey juicier…and gives you more ENERGY POINTS for your day! 😉

This is the first morning in a long time that I can write again without having to give an Oprah report. She is still, very much, a guiding light for me. Now, I just move forward knowing that her energy and this latest experience is something that propels me forward into my destiny. Whatever that destiny is, is what is written in my heart…the trick is to get your brain to either TURN OFF or ALLOW you to start going towards YOUR path. Manifesting your destiny is not just a cool “new age” phrase. It is your soul’s plan for being on this planet.

Think about that. Most of us lead “under the radar” lives. We do what is “expected” of us. We worry that it is not enough. When we feel the ICKIES we STASH them deep inside…quick before anyone sees what our true feelings are. We are jealous of others who we PERCEIVE as prettier, wealthier, smarter, better looking mate, more kids, less kids, thinner ankles, bigger boobs, smaller boobs, better house, better zip code….the list is pretty much ENDLESS. Guess what?  On planet earth you will NEVER get 100% of EVERYONE’s approval! EVER! Even candidates who run for office who are super, super, super popular NEVER, EVER, EVER get 100%of the votes for that is simply not how the world is wired. The BIG difference between people who go for what they want and those who don’t is this….People who go for what they want FEEL that NOT GOING FOR IT is MORE PAINFUL than just maintaining their current life.

For me, pre-kids, I THOUGHT I was on a pretty good projectile. I THOUGHT I was GOING AFTER my DREAMS and I was. I was CHASING. CHASING. CHASING. Energetically when you chase something it runs from you even more! We’ve all seen that in some form in our lives. It was a very cool life in many ways, but also one FULL OF LIVING JUST OUTSIDE MY JOY…NEVER QUITE THERE.

This tremendous Oprah Show experience has brought MY “THERE” into my “HERE”. Take that in for a moment. How can YOU bring your dreams, passions, desires into YOUR “HERE”, the only place it can really be SAVOURED…and quite frankly, DEVOURED! 😉  YUMMA-LISH Y’ALL!!!!!!! 😉

Yesterday, I had my first workshop since the Oprah experience and it was FANTABULOUS!!! I hope the people who were there will leave a comment below as some have on Facebook because it was such an awesome experience! The energy was simply fabulous. We got to the heart of issues. We shifted energy around to where it better served us. We learned some TOOLS to help us cope with life’s ickies. We learned how to call our power back. We moved ENERGETIC BOULDERS that were on TOP of us under us so we could stand even taller! It FELT soooooooooooooo amazing to be with these ButterflyMoms! WOW!

They have asked that we meet again so I’m extending this invitation to you. We are meeting next Thursday, June 9th , 8pm at 783 Washington Street, Holliston. Easy to get to on Route 16 with plenty of free parking in the back. Cost is $25 at the door (you still need to pre-register though because space is limited) or just $20 if you drop off a check or pay through Paypal… http://bit.ly/mS7c70

I am personally inviting you to this workshop to help YOU get back to the HAPPY YOU! It’s food for your soul…like a triple-dose of the ButterflyMoms blog!  Come play with me and some of the other ButterflyMoms! Simply sign up here… www.butterflymoms.com/workshops.html.

I am deeply grateful and deeply humble by all the LOVE LOVE  LOVE! It is there for all of us to partake in. Just scoop up a great big heaping spoonful of LOVE and rub it on like lotion! Imagine the day you will have by doing that!! Have a RUB A DUB DAY!!! 😉

Great big hugs,

Maariaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

PS  Zero books sold this week. The following is a list of places where ButterflyMoms live who bought our wonderful book MOM ENTREPRENEUR EXTRAORDINAIRE…

UNITED STATES

California

Anaheim 1

Fullerton 1

Sacramento 1

San Bruno 1

Connecticut

Greenwich 1

Yalesville 1

Kentucky

Louisville 1

Maryland

Chestertown 1

Massachusetts

Ashland 2

Holliston 10

Hudson 4

Medway 3

North Easton 1

Sherborn 1

South Grafton 1

Watertown 1

Worcester 3

Missouri

Lee’s Summit 1

New York

Scarsdale 1

Stony Brook 1

Ohio

Dublin 1

Rhode Island

Newport 1

Vermont

Waitsville (Mad River Valley) 2

AUSTRIA

Wien, Austria 2

IRELAND

Dublin, Ireland 1

ITALY

Rome, Italy 3

JAPAN

Tokyo  1

PORTUGAL

Santa Maria (Azores/Açores)  1

*To buy your copy Click here now…http://bit.ly/gRxe4U

*Mark your calendar to read ButterflyMoms EVERY Friday! 

       Share the

       ButterflyMoms

       blog

       with your

       beloved

       friends!

       Spread

       the love!  

       www.butterflymoms.com

OPRAH UPDATE…One, Six and Thirteen!

 

 

Dearest Beautiful ButterflyMoms,

First, an Oprah update. The producer called again this past week and there was renewed hope that I would be on one of the last shows. He even had us get Sophia’s birth and death certificate to send to him just in case he could do something but that did not pan out. It is sad but at least I put myself out there and there are many more adventures I cannot even imagine coming my way! I’m excited! Thanks for coming on that journey with me!

Just finished a Goddess Weekend that was out of this world! It was at this retreat last year that I started writing ButterflyMoms on a consistent basis. So HAPPY ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY BUTTERFLYMOMS!!!

The retreat got me thinking that we can all use a little time away to re-group and re-energize soooooo….(trumpets please)…… We are scheduling our first ButterflyMoms Retreat the weekend of October 22, 2011 in Mad River Vermont at a magical inn! We are still working on the details but space will be limited so if you are at all interested let me know. Carving out the time for our highest good is the best thing we can do for ourselves! :)!

I ask you to take a DEEP, DEEP BREATH with me as I enter into today’s blog…

Sophia and Me at her first birthday party

I never know how I’m going to be on May12 and June 22. Those are my Sophia’s birthday and deathday.

Sometimes sooooooooooooooooo much emotion wants to come out that I’m afraid those around me cannot handle it. Quite honestly most of my grieving has been alone…or SWALLOWING MY GRIEF because of this fear that others cannot handle it. Some of the work I’ve been doing at the Rhys Thomas Energy Medicine School, especially lately, has allowed me to open/release some of that energy, some very powerful stuff!

It’s hard, you know, to talk to others about the birth and death of your baby because if that other person REALLY went “THERE” with you it…well, I can’t say I honestly know what would happen, but it’s a lot of pain and in a way I guess I protect others from it because then I think I need to save them from it. I don’t know if I’m making sense to you but this is how I feel. There is soooo much magic that has come from her death but I would give it all up to have Sophia back in my arms. I don’t know if that is the PC thing to say but that is how MY HEART FEELS. I miss her sooooooooooooooooo much, our Sophalicious. I have had many, many people die in this lifetime, losing your baby is TOTALLY a different feeling. It is that type of grief that can knock the wind out of my sails and because I have so many responsibilities I cannot crawl into bed and stay there so I activate AUTOMATIC PILOT, put on a smiley face and go off into my day.  I KNOW I’m not the only one! Sometime I do it so automatically, in fact, that I don’t know that I’ve ACTIVATED it. I NOTICE that when I do this I take a VERY DEEP BREATH and then probably don’t exhale for the rest of the day. That is how I perceive it.

Grieving, for me, is this endless circle of wanting to get to HIGHER GROUND, to being as “ok” with Sophia’s death as I can be and then being hit by a Tsunami of pain, never knowing who you are going to be in front of when it happens.

At Sophia's Christening with Parents, Siblings and God Parents... Sooo much LOVE!

esterday would have been Sophia’s 6th birthday. She died at 13 months so it’s fitting that I’m writing this on Friday the 13th…. BTW, found out that Friday the 13th is a VERY POWERFUL GODDESS DAY…When  the Roman Catholic Church was trying to take over, they made it a bad luck day instead. I, for one am reclaiming the magic of Friday the 13th!!! Who’s with me? 😉

Today’s blog is just pouring out of me and I’m not stopping it. It has REALLY wanted to come out. The word that keeps coming up around yesterday is HUMBLE, HUMBLE, HUMBLE.

I was COMPLETELY blown away by the outpouring of LOVE, LOVE, LOVE that our family received yesterday!  We had more than 200 people (I can’t even believe I’m typing that number!!!) reach out via email, phone, text, voicemail, facebook and even a handful of  in person visits from dear friends who seemed to really be holding a space of LOVE for the day as I had requested on FB. This may surprise you writing how I do but I usually don’t open myself up to get the love BECAUSE TO OPEN TO THE LOVE, YOU HAVE TO BE OPEN TO THE PAIN. I was more vulnerable yesterday than I have been in a long time and that is why I was able to ASK for what I needed. I asked for others to hold us in LOVE…and I highly suggest it because it felt wonderful! Like floating, really if you let yourself go….there is a downside though that is ALSO important to know about…. WARNING: When that happens SHIT that has been in your life’s “basement” comes up….and baby that shit stinks! It was soooo powerful that it rocked my marriage. We had to work some things out. Key is to go with the flow, stay open, stay authentic and for goodness sakes KEEP MOVING FORWARD (but in a BEING PRESENT WAY)!!!

A very special thank you to all those who reached out yesterday. YOU deeply help me and my family heal a bit more. I was going to try to list everyone’s name here but if I forgot someone that would not do. I would invite you to go to my Facebook page and read all the magnificent comments from around the world. It is a magnificent example of SHEER LOVE!!! I am deeply grateful and deeply humble by that LOVE!

Great big hugs,

Maariaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

Sophia and her Vovo

PS  A plethora of books sold this week! We FINALLY SOLD ONE IN PORTUGAL!!!! YAY! (Thank you Madrinha Juvenalia Figueiredo!) We also sold two in VERMONT (Thank you Evelyn and Kristen Meyer!) which is a new state for us and one in Watertown, MA (Thank you Christine McDade!) and another in CONNECTICUT (Thank you Sheryn MacMunn)! WHEW WHO!!!! I LOVE BEING ON THIS JOURNEY WITH YOU! SOOOO FUN!!!!

Here is where the books have gone to ButterflyMoms…

UNITED STATES

California

Fullerton 1

Sacramento 1

Connecticut

Greenwich 1

Yalesville 1

Maryland

Chestertown 1

Massachusetts

Ashland 2

Holliston 10

Hudson 4

Medway 3

North Easton 1

Sherborn 1

South Grafton 1

Watertown 1

Worcester 3

New York

Scarsdale 1

Stony Brook 1

Ohio

Dublin 1

Rhode Island

Newport 1

Vermont

Waitsville (Mad River Valley) 2

AUSTRIA

Wien, Austria 2

IRELAND

Dublin, Ireland 1

ITALY

Rome, Italy 3

JAPAN

Tokyo  1

PORTUGAL

Santa Maria (Azores/Açores)  1

Me at Hemingway's House in Key West

*To buy your copy for you and a friend click here now. Feed the LOVE in your life…. http://bit.ly/gRxe4U .

*Mark your calendar to read ButterflyMoms EVERY Friday! 

       Share the

       ButterflyMoms

       blog

       with your

       beloved

       friends!

       Spread

       the love!  

       www.butterflymoms.com

STRIPPING YOURSELF ON MOTHER’S DAY!

Dearest Beautiful ButterflyMoms,

Sometimes it seems that life is stripping you raw. No matter what you try, things that are a deep part of our life fall apart, go “wrong”, break, and/or simply disappear. I have noticed patterns in my life where this happens. I’m in one of those very patterns. It started with my son Christopher accidently spilling water next to my computer. As that glass of water fell, my life’s trajectory shifted into a new direction and I entered into the LAND OF YOU-ARE-ABOUT-TO-LOSE-A-WHOLE-BUNCH-OF –VERY –IMPORTANT-DATA-AND-SPEND-A-LOT-OF-MONEY-AND-TIME-HOPELESSLY-TRYING-TO-FIX-IT! After three weeks of trying to recover it, my hard drive is being flown to Wisconsin to see if they can recover my original mother board (how appropriate with Mother’s Day this weekend). The computer I bought less than 2 weeks ago had a corrupt operating system and I spent a large part of yesterday at Apple with the technicians, talking to my computer guy, looking for files…..Believe I COULD go on and on around this but let’s move to a bird’s eye view of the situation, shall we.

It is PRETTY obvious that I’m being STRIPPED RAW of my technology. I can get into my head very easily. I know I’m doing this because I get into those LIFE MODELS of “WORK-CHORES-KIDS-TV-SLEEP” (not in that order). I carve out very little time to hang out with friends or to read or anything like that. As much as I dislike to admit it, my GREAT TRANQUILIZER is my television and BOY DO I USE IT TO MEDICATE myself. Sure it’s entertaining but when you are lacking sleep and you choose TV over sleep like I do almost EVERY night I know there is an issue. I know I could spend my time more wisely. I know my life would shift in ways I have been dreaming about. (DEEP BREATH HERE)

This is one of those BRIDGE POINTS in life where you begin to SEE what the issue is and then you add CHOICE. Sure I can HIDE from my CHOICE but that is not, not making a CHOICE. As the double negative shows here in this sentence, we cannot be NEUTRAL. Life NEVER stops flowing. Sometimes we want to stop it and say NO but life keeps on flowin’ and the same way you cannot stop the ocean, you cannot stop this rhythm of life so what to do?

Key here is to, as my good friend Keith has been reminding me for the last couple of years, “SURRENDER”. Surrender the fight! Whatever you FIGHT grows. PICTURE that and then take a moment to FEEL it in your body. If your child does not do what you want and you begin to YELL does that make the situation any better really? If you lower your voice and speak to that child does it shift things in a different direction without the ICKIES? If you find yourself in NOT TAKING CARE OF ME MODE is fighting with yourself about how you SHOULD going to help you?

This Mother’s Day consciously TAKE OFF your boxing gloves, STRIP YOURSELF RAW, knowing that you are always safe. As the beautiful Carolyn Myss and Wayne Dyer both say, it is an illusion that we control anything really. We have the power of CHOICE, like WHAT TO FOCUS ON, but the big stuff is out of our hands so instead of STRESSING OUT your whole ride, why not let go and ENJOY IT?

FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY EVER-GROWING HEART…..HAPPY MOTHERS’ DAY!!!!

Great big hugs,

Maariaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

PS No books sold this week. This week buy a copy for you and your best friend Just click here… http://bit.ly/gRxe4U. BE REPRESENTED! This is FUN!

Here is where the books have gone to ButterflyMoms…

UNITED STATES

California

Fullerton 1

Sacramento 1

Connecticut

Yalesville 1

Maryland

Chestertown 1

Massachusetts

Ashland 2

Holliston 10

Hudson 4

Medway 3

North Easton 1

Sherborn 1

South Grafton 1

Worcester 3

New York

Scarsdale 1

Stony Brook 1

Ohio

Dublin 1

Rhode Island

Newport 1

AUSTRIA

Wien, Austria 2

IRELAND

Dublin, Ireland 1

ITALY

Rome, Italy 3

JAPAN

Tokyo  1

🙂 To buy your copy Click here now…http://bit.ly/gRxe4U .

🙂 Mark your calendar to read ButterflyMoms EVERY Friday! 

       Share the

      ButterflyMoms

       blog

       with your

       beloved friends!

       Spread the love!  

       www.butterflymoms.com

ANGRY AT GOD!

Thank you ButterflyMoms for your help especialy Helen for reaching out!

Beautiful ButterflyMoms,

First, I want to thank Helen Bannigan for her wonderful guest post yesterday. It is wonderful to have heart friends like her and those who reached out. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for lightening my burden and giving me a renewed sense of hope!

I find myself in a very precarious part of my life’s journey. For the most part, it does not feel very good to be where I am right now.  If I take the fear and the judgment away I can say that I am definitely experiencing a lot of deep “shifts”. There is a river of rapid, unexpected CHANGE currently re-arranging my life… and that usually does not feel very good to us humans, especially when you seem to be following “the” rules, but not getting the promised results.

I’ve been in a phase where something “icky” happens and I dust myself off,  put on a “stiff upper lip and conjure up all the self-help advice I’ve acquired over the years. Then another “Icky” thing happens, then another, then another, almost like “instead of it’s raining men, it’s raining icky.” It gets so bad that you start to think that the universe is pulling a cruel joke on you. It is seems like your whole life is deconstructing without your conscious consent. You think you are at that bottom and then you arrive at a new lower, bottom. Your life seems to be in free-fall mode. You feel scared, disconnected, and angry.

Life sometimes feel overwhelming!

As someone who has been to third world countries and seen how many/most of the people of our planet Earth live, there is a part of me, THE JUDGE, who rides me like a mule. “Look at you! You have running water, heat, a car that works, healthy children, a body that works, etc…SNAP OUT OF IT! “ And I did,  I did “snap out of it again and again but there is a part of us that we bury when we simply “snap out of it” without acknowledging what is going on because it’s not convenient, or it makes others uncomfortable, or because it does not feel good, or_____________ (you fill in your own answer).

I get the sense that many feel this way but being raised the way we have been it is not “proper” for us to feel “icky” for very long or even simply be ANGRY. Well-wishers and loved ones also tell me to think about all that I have and to be thankful for that. It is true that I do have a lot to be thankful for but sometimes we feel what we feel and cutting off those feelings or sugar-coating what is going on in life, well quite honestly, sometimes life just SUCKS!

I remember back to a time when we had someone from Early Intervention coming to the house when we first had Sophia. Wise, white-haired Barbara was a wonderful soul who came to the house once a week to help us cope with Sophia having Downs and to make the most out of her life. She had a conversation with Doug once that helped snap everything into place. Barbara also had a special needs son who was now a man, she just blurted out one day, “Ya, it sucks.” Just saying those words released Doug in a very deep way. To be able to say that it sucks that you are in that situation without all the KUMBAHYAH fanfare feels REFRESHING! It is acknowledging your true feelings, not what you are supposed to feel.

What does it all mean when it's all falling apart.

It is only when we acknowledge that things do ROYALLY SUCK that we can begin to “move past the sucking”!!! Ignoring it just lets the SUCKINESS grow and fester. It may seem to go away but it only gets nastier and when it finally oozes back into your life you will wish you had addressed it MUCH sooner.

I spent my whole life creating a plan and working that plan of how to avoid pain and have the life I wanted. Over the last few years the universe has completely blown up that world. I AM RAW. Right now my life feels like it’s coming at me full speed. I feel like a rag doll getting thrown around. I don’t know where life is leading me but I will continue to be as authentic and present as I know how. Mark your calendars to come back every Friday for the unfolding journey. Feel free to share your comments below. This is how we can all learn and grow our ButterflyMoms souls.

Great big hugs,

Mariaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

PS  My first book “Entrepreneurial Moms Extraordinaire” is scheduled to be shipped at the end of next week. For ButterflyMoms who order it online it is discounted to $19.99 for ButterflyMoms (down from $25). Please order a copy and recommend to your online friends. Click here to buy, and post the link on your Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, …. http://bit.ly/gRxe4U.

PPS Yesterday we had our first Stitch n’ Bitch at Doug Sent Me Green Cleaners in the downtown of an idyllic New England town called Holliston, Massachusetts. It was sooooo incredibly cathartic. It was so wonderful that the people who came asked if we could do it again in two weeks instead of a month. If you don’t live close enough to Holliston to come Thursday, Feb 3 from 6-8pm then join your own group. Building community is another way we feed our soul. For more information you can go to their official website…. http://stitchnbitch.org/

CHRISTMAS…I LOVE YOU THIS MANY DOLLARS!

 

A Christmas classic about opening your Heart & letting go of hatred

 

Dearest ButterflyMoms,

What an honor it is to write to you on one of my favorite days of the year, December 24th! I like it even better than the 25th because there is sooooo much hope and anticipation, much like the climbing part of the roller coaster as you hit the top and even JUST start going over the other side. For most people, ESPECIALLY in America, December 24th is about gifts, gifts, gifts. Sure there is the food and getting together with family and all the traditions but the one thing it all hinges upon is the GIFTS!

Christmas for many of us is the time when the HOPE of creating the Christmas we never got crashes head on into the GUILT of not being there for our children as much as we’d like. The result is a BIG EMPTY feeling that many of us have tried to fill during the last few decades through more and bigger gifts. How’s that workin’ for ya? Hmmmmm?

...But the kids are having sooooo much fun!!!! NOT!

What is the truth? The TRUTH is that all kids want to be SEEN, HEARD and UNDERSTOOD(SHU). (funny that the acronym is SHU like when you are waiving off a cat or something, “Shu cat, shu 😉 SHU is essentially the meaning of LOVE to both kids, and adults if you took the time to really notice. Most of us were not SHU by our parents so we do this crazy SUPER-SIZING OUR LIVES to make up for our lack of FEELING whole. Meanwhile our minds are somewhere else. We ignore our kids. We don’t see them. We don’t really listen to them. We oftentimes don’t even SHU ourselves because we are focused on our TO DO LIST and BILLS and WORK and FAMILY STUFF. Our kids feel this to their core. The problem is that instead of thinking that, “Oh Mama is just “busy”, they form the INTERNALIZED CORE BELIEF “I’m not lovable!” and thus the EMPTY feelings get passed on, yet again, to the next generation.

Take that in for a moment…..(“Really, really.” Shrek quote) take a couple of deep breaths….How does that feel for you?….Keep taking some deep breaths and go there….Release what’s not working….Sometimes we hold “habit beliefs” that no longer serve us until we realize they are doing more harm than protecting us.

The Beauty of Waking up Early in New England!

I got up at 4:30am today to write with no alarm clock. I LOVE that time! Yesterday I broke my old habits of going to bed late so today I was able to give myself the luxury of having MY morning time to be with the planet and myself, knowing my children and husband are snug in the their beds. I LOVE that feeling! It costs absolutely nothing for me to bring this into my life, no money, no sacrifice, no ordering, no studying, no effort. All it takes is me:

  1. Step one….Bringing awareness to it.
  2. Step two….Changing my actions.
  3. Step three…Feeling how very wonderful it feels to be in this moment! Ahhhhhhhhhh!

Arden and Tandei

When the change happens new things, that really fill our souls, enter. For the last year something has been knocking on my door but I was not ready to open it. I opened the door today and this is what I found….The work my beautiful friend Arden has been doing for 10 years!!!

Her life’s mission “snuck up” on her ten years ago when she was a grad student. What was only supposed to be a semester in Zimbabwe, turned into a year, which turned into forming a spectacular non-profit, that has survived ten years of unbelievable odds!

Coalition for Courage http://www.coalitionforcourage.org/contact.htm is a true grassroots organization located in Norton, Zimbabwe and run out of Jamaica Plain, Massachusetts! (My neck of the woods!!) Arden works with orphans and vulnerable kids who are affected by and infected with HIV. This small organization is a ray of light in a very dark sky. The agency provides much needed support to some of the poorest children in one of the poorest countries in the world. Arden does the kind of work that every mother prays someone will do if her child is ever left alone in the world. Unfortunately in Africa, it is heart-breaking that many children are indeed completely alone because of the ravages of war disease and famine. I spent two hours this morning gloriously soaking up the newsletter and website, feeding my soul and connecting to the souls involved in this work. Two boys stood out.

Tendai before his mother died...what a cutie pie!!!

One is nine year old little boy, named Tendai, who Arden first met when he was in the first grade. She was friends with his mother. One day Tendai appears on her doorstep with ripped shorts, no shoes, emaciated, filthy shirt and sores all over his legs. He shares that his mother has died. Soon after he and his older brother were evicted from their home. His brother, not much older than Tendai tried desperately to get work JUST to buy food but could not. All beautifully recounted in Arden’s newsletter http://coalitionforcourage.org/hard_decisions.htm

The other boy who stands out is a 14 year old kid, Salvatore Sprofera from Medfield who found out about Arden’s heart organization, Coalition for Courage. Sal also discovered the kids and Zimbabwe and he shared a common passion, SOCCER (or “futebol” as most of the world calls it). He started collecting cans at his school and word spread. It took Sal a year and a half but he collected over 500 and over 40 jerseys, 80 pairs of socks, 50 pairs of cleats, and half a dozen soccer balls.This young teenager also got locals stores and organizations to donate uniforms, balls, shin guards and socks. Sal was fortunate enough to go to Zimbabwe with his mother this year to deliver the items. The children at Arden’s orphan care center were so excited that they even hoisted him up on their shoulders! Sal was written up in the following newspapers if you’d like to inspire your own kids that they CAN make a difference!…

http://www.wickedlocal.com/medfield/features/x549827562/Team-Building-Medfield-teen-shares-love-of-soccer-in-Africa

http://www.boston.com/news/local/articles/2010/10/31/millis_teen_tommy_barrett_jr_racks_up_wins_on_racetracks/

 

Salvatore visits his new friends in Zimbabwe!

 

I read about Tendai and Salvatore’s lives to my six year old Mialotta today who on January 3 will be the big 7!!!!!! Mia immediately suggested that her birthday party be the kick-off to helping Arden’s kids. Instead of presents they will bring donations and we will brainstorm later what else we can do to help.

I am honored to have around me, Salvatore, Tendai, Arden and Mialotta, beautiful souls I’ve encountered on my life’s journey who so elegantly remind me to, as Gandhi perfectly shared, “Be the change I want to see in the world.”

MERRY CHRISTMAS!

Great big honkin’ hugs,
Mariaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

PS  In this season of giving sometimes the best gifts are those that don’t cost anything. Give someone the gift of ButterflyMoms but just sending them the link….www.butterflymoms.com and telling them to check out the blog section. Abundantly feed your friends’ and family’s hearts and souls for free! :)! Guilt-free giving with meaning! YAY!

PPS Coming at the end of January…..MY FIRST BOOK!!!!! Here’s the cover! WHEW WHO!!!!!

YOUR ANGEL OR YOUR DEVIL?

We have this wondeful Christmas tradition of walking to get our Chritsmas tree! Another wonderful gift from living in beautifuul Holliston!

Dearest ButterflyMoms,

Every Friday when I sit at my computer I am met with a flood of ideas and voices all crowding each other to be heard. My first reaction is to feel overwhelmed. What happens next is critical. I have one of two choices. One, I can “stand down”, which is a cool line I picked up from watching action movies, which means I can abandon my writing, OR, two, I can choose to surrender. What do I mean by surrendering? In surrendering I simply sit back, change my breath pattern (feels like taking a big sigh, sometimes even two or three…depends on the day), and asking, much like that 70’s gameshow, “Will the real ______ please stand up.” In this case I’m asking for help from the universe to guide me to write towards “my best and highest good”.

Once I make that request I’m given only the very first part of what to write about. I surrender again as I feel my mind creep in with “helpful” suggestions. There is a place for your mind but, in writing, I find that REALLY good writing happens only when your brain serves as background information help and not the main writer. The main writing, at least for me, comes from spirit. It’s so fun for me to write, because I never know how it’s going to turn out.

About two weeks before Sophia died. This was at her first birthday party which was an incredibly magical day!

The very first time I experienced this (that I am super conscious of) was the morning I awoke after my little girl Sophia’s sudden death. As I was sleeping I started getting a stream of words  coming through. I tried to ignore it but I had a DEEP KNOWING that I would not remember it later and that it was important that it be shared. My mind was still semi-asleep as my soul guided my body downstairs to my desk and began to write as fast as I could to catch up to the words that were streaming in. Those were the words that I later read at her funeral and can be found here…. http://www.becauseofsophia.com/whoissophia.asp#Letter

The universe is always channeling energy through you. You have sooooo many resources around you that if you STOPPED to REALIZE it you would be amazed, delighted and humbled. Today, slow down, listen to your inner voice, use your breath. Do it consciously. For some because you don’t do this very often you might get the voice of fear/judgment. That is the ego! It is only happy when it is controlling you. It can only control you if you forget that your ego is NOT YOU! Remember in the Tom & Jerry or Bugs Bunny cartoons when you saw the devil and the angel on the character’s shoulder? The devil is the ego. It is only happy if you are not. Here’s where most people get lost in the mix, judging or punishing the ego only makes it stronger. The only way to get rid of it is to BRING GENTLE AWARENESS to it. Realize that it is not you but your fears. Realize that when the ego is on YOUR TRUE SELF cannot be. The TREASURE of who YOU really are is buried underneath that layer of icky. This is not “good” or “bad”, it is just the reason for why your life is the way it is. All you have to do is ACTIVATE CHOICE. Is this how I want to live my life? YES, stay the same. NO, then shift to breath and awareness of the present moment, like me and my writing, you will be given only the next step. Trust in that. Sit back, activate your breath and ACTIVATE YOUR NOW! The only power we have is in the present moment. This season of gift-giving give yourself the gift of ACTIVATING YOURS.

I thank you for showing up in your own life. If you have been attracted to our wonderful ButterflyMoms blog the universe is sending you a message that your soul already knows. Create from it what you need to. About 1,000 readers come to ButterflyMoms every week to feed their souls. Thank you for being a part of this wonderful community! As we all continue to celebrate this magical holiday season I wish you much AWARENESS in your life so that your pure JOY can come streaming in! MERRY EVERYTHING!

Great big hugs,
Mariaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂 

PS In this season of giving sometimes the best gifts are those that don’t cost anything. Give someone the gift of ButterflyMoms but just sending them the link…. www.butterflymoms.com and telling them to check out the blog section. Feed your friends’ and family’s souls for free! :)!

PPS Please help me support my dream, the one Sophia helped me push forward. After so much struggling and excuses, I am sooooooooooooooooooooooooo thrilled that my dream of writing a book is finally come true!!! It’s been TWENTY YEARS in the making!!!! Entrepreneurial Moms Extraordinaire is the amazing wisdom of 21 entrepreneurial moms who are passing on their knowledge to those who don’t have time for beating around the bush! We all need to make money NOW and live our lives well NOW. This book will definitely help in a very profound way! It’s coming out at the end of January. It will be $25 but if you pre-order it now you get it for only $19.99. Of course I will autograph it for you too! J Send me an email at maria@butterflymoms.com and I will send you the order form. YOU WILL LOVE IT!!!!

The Depths of a Mother’s Desperation – Part Two

WARNING: The content you are about to read is soooooooo inspiring that it may cause tears and an uncontrollable urge to send this blog to others. Do not fight the urges. Do not adjust your computer. Do giggle and cry and ponder and share and breathe and write and draw and sing and whatever else feels good to you in the moment. What you are feeling is the AUTHENTIC YOU, reaching out of its shell. Feel free to TRY THIS AT HOME…AND OFTEN! “FEED YOUR SOUL!!!!!!!!!!!”  It’s soooooo easy! Start here…

These are the first photos we ever got of Olivia from the social worker. I looked at these photos for hours and hours. She looked so stiff and so sad to me.

Hello Beautiful ButterflyMoms!

I was floored when I checked to see that with yesterday’s post we are now up to almost 700 people who have come to read this week’s ButterflyMoms’ blog! WOW! …..AND with no nudie photos or gratuitous sex….although ButterflyMoms KNOW there is a place for that too!  YESIREE!!!!!! 😉 (wink, wink, wink) Thank you for sharing BUTTERFLYMOMS with your friends and family. From the AMAZING feedback it seems that the combination of me writing, and you sharing, is FEEDING a lot of souls – that warms the cockles of my heart! THANK YOU! I’m writing this in my gratitude journal! That’s for sure! I invite you to write in yours today. It compounds your energy in the direction that you want. It gives you more light and fullness in this lifetime.  Baby steps will get us there….each day closer and closer…AND nothing says we can’t have FUN as we go! When I taught in Japan I used to say all the time, “If you are not laughing, you are not learning.” I believe that quote still applies now, especially with what we are doing here with ButterflyMoms! We are all learning how to feed our once starving souls. It is a process. It is an adventure. I LOVE that we are doing this together! YIPEEEEEEEEEE!

Yesterday’s blog entry was part one of two parts. It was about getting gifts, but not just any gift. It was about being offered another human being.  YUP! You read me correctly, being offered a real PERSON! Yesterday was about Thailand when I was 22. Today is about the United States of America less than three years ago when I was 40.

Our very first meeting. Olivia could not keep her eyes off of Doug. This photo shows that beautifully!

I used to read voraciously as a child because I wanted so desperately to escape the tragedy of parts of my childhood. I could escape in books. I felt like a beautiful bird in a cage. I could see the outside but could not leave. I knew that one day the cage door would open so I wanted to learn as much as I could of the outside world while I was “trapped” in this one. The Hudson Public Library was my gateway to knowledge, fun and creativity. I LOVED, LOVED, LOVED that place! To this day I have a HUGE respect for libraries because of what wonderful gifts I received there as a child.

The first time I ever held our Divine Miss Olivia

[SIDENOTE: I ask that you support your local library. It is usually a very small amount of money to “become a friend”. As a business owner both my husband Doug and I apply separately as members of the library. It’s very inexpensive to join and soooo much good comes from our libraries! It is another example of something AMAZING right under our noses that we FORGET TO NOTICE. I ask you today to bring AWARENESS to yours (your library, not your nose ;)). Become a member today. IT FEELS GREAT! Go there. Smile at the people. Take out some books. Check out a section you never gave yourself time to check out. Feel the space. Take your Gratitude Journal and do some entries while you are there. There is no right or wrong way to enjoy your library. Connect with things that represent what public libraries do and you will attract more of that into your life! It’s as simple as that! Put it in your calendar NOW and do it! You will FEEL THE DIFFERENCE! Now back to our regularly scheduled blog entry….. 😉 ]

This is the first time Mialotta ever met her new baby sister. Olivia was totally unemotional. I had never seen a chlld act like that. You could tell she had not experienced deep MAMA LOVE!

So one day by the back wall I picked out a book at the Hudson Public Library that changed my life. It was a book about a couple who meant to adopt one child and ended up adopting A LOT of them. I had never been exposed to adoption but after reading it I KNEW that was something that would one day make up the fabric of my life. I put the wish (a strong visualization with lots of feeling) out into the universe and let it go, knowing it would take care of itself when the time was right. (I did not know that was what I was doing but that was what I was, in fact, doing.) It is a very powerful way to manifest what you want.

I, like most of us, had an idea of what I wanted a partnership and family to look like. I had no idea how I would get there. There were times where the HARDER I TRIED to do the “RIGHT” things the further I seemed from having the “FAMILY” I dreamed about. Time kept moving on and still all I had were a bunch of Mr. I’m Not Ready’s, so I finally got to the point where I decided to let go and trust. It was then that I met Doug and it was like I entered a fantastic whirlwind. Honestly I’m surprised I did not get WHIPLASH! First, part of the package was a stepson, the lovely Master Christopher who is a total cutie pie, then Mialotta, then Sophia. Mialotta and Sophia were only 14 months apart. When Sophia died we kept trying to get pregnant but just kept miscarrying. I brought up adoption to Doug and over time he agreed to take it one step at a time. We would go to each meeting or class and he would say whether he felt ok to move forward. Before we knew it the state of Massachusetts called and asked if we wanted a HUMAN BEING. Please know that I’m not making light of this. I’m simply in awe of the whole process. Someone again was offering to give me a human being…and with no stretch marks! WOW! WOW! WOW! If you are paying attention to life that is deep!

One of the first meals she had in her new home. Already a difference in how she smiles.

[SIDENOTE: Adoption is something that is not very well understood by many people. It is possible to adopt from within the U.S. There are plenty of amazing children out there who don’t have anyone to call “Mom”. Ok so this is bigger than my asking you support your local library but it’s something that if you are attracted to will help you leave an incredible legacy. I’ve always fantasized about having a large group of girlfriends over for dinner and when they got there have about 20 kids there of all ages. I’d let everyone hang out and play games. The kids would leave after many giggles and when we all sat down to eat I would ask, “Weren’t those kids great?” They would all nod and smile thinking about them then I would say, “Every one of those children has no home. They have no Mom or Dad. They are alone

The Sisters Adore Each Other!

in the world.” Ok, since I can’t use my dinner party “ploy” on you now I’m asking you to pretend you were at that dinner party yourself. How would you feel? Here is some adoption information you may not know. If you adopt through the state of Massachusetts (I don’t know about other states but I believe it’s also free). It’s TOTALLY FREE to adopt. YUP, we did not pay a penny! Our Olivia also has FREE HEALTHCARE. Once legal NO ONE can take them away from you. Also her college is paid for if she goes to a state school! How is that for cool?! If you have specific questions I’d be happy to answer them. They help you find the right child for you. We got exactly the person we were meant to, the divine Miss Olivia. Most who don’t want to adopt do so because they freak out about not getting someone they envision. I find that you get exactly who you need and just like with most everything in life, you get to approve of each step of the process. If you want to move forward with a child, you also get their complete history. We found that VERY helpful. Just like with the children in Thailand, it breaks my heart that thousands of wonderful kids have no homes. We can solve this one! By just OPENING our mouths and sharing our Olivia adoption story there are now at least six kids who have been adopted. If we got the word out to enough people and explained what was RIGHT HAPPENING RIGHT UNDER THEIR NOSES there would be a safe, happy home for each and every child. It happens by starting with just one! If you would like a quick preview check out the link… http://www.mareinc.org/MARE-Online-Photolisting.html

The Mother's Day celebration at her schoolie where the kids prepared a yummy lunch for their mommies! So special!

I have to admit as a mom who lost a child I had a hard time for a long while because there was a part of me that felt guilty for having someone else’s child. If someone had my Sophia I could not bear the pain of it. My heart goes out to all the moms who have LOST children no matter how they were taken from them. I now know the pain of losing and that of receiving. In Part One, I spoke about my 22 year old self and feeling horrible that I could not take a child from her mother, then at 40, I felt the guilt of having someone else’s child. Life is a great big unfolding of the unexpected. It has come full circle for me in a way. You do the best with what is before you and as Maya Angelou says, “When you know better, you do better.” My desire is that by reading ButterflyMoms on a regular basis, you find YOUR BETTER!

Great big hugs,
Mariaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

Olivia Now.... When you pour LOVE into anyone Miracles Happen.

PS If you like what you read please post this on your FB, Twitter, LinkedIn, MySpace, etc and email friends. In the melee of our daily lives, we can all use a gentle reminder to connect to what is REAL and feels good! Here is the link for today’s entry… http://wp.me/pBdfR-9U

ENJOY SHARING THE LOVE!

CONNECTING AGAIN…(AND a call from THE Oprah Show!)

Now this is a Park!!!! Parque das Conchas - Lisboa, Portugal!

HELLO! HELLO! HELLO! MY BEAUTIFUL BUTTERFLYMOMS!!!!

Have you missed ButterflyMoms? 😉  I’ve missed YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Wow! It seems like forever and at the same time like just yesterday. I stopped writing two weeks ago because I was spending so much time trying to get online. I had a really bad connection, EFFORTING all the way! It was taking time away from my kids, family, friends and vacation. Sometimes it took me more than 8 hours to download the content I had written with photos for ONE posting onto the ButterflyMoms site! It was very stressful and of course I took it mostly from MY sleeping time – when the kids were asleep. After a while I got a “little” cranky. Who wants to be cranky when they are surrounded by beauty, sun, history, good food and summer in Portugal?! No one, that’s who! 😉

So why am I writing now? Well great that you should ask! Check out how the universe works….Most of you know that when I started writing daily for ButterflyMoms it was like I put on HUGE antennas out into the world and immediately STUFF started SHIFTING! The biggest was that I got a call from an Oprah Show producer about being ON the show! (A big “ZOWIE” with cartwheels!!!!!!) That dream had laid dormant (cocooning) because of motherhood and life in general (you know the drill! ;)) While I was talking to the producer he went to the ButterflyMoms site and checked it out! I was soooo thrilled!!! I sent them what he requested (some more information and a headshot). He said he would pitch it to the other producers and if were good enough they’d be in touch. It’s the ‘ole “don’t call us, we’ll call you.” 😉 An amazing thing happened! Instead of worrying like I was culturally taught to do ;), I let go of the OUTCOME! (deep breath – really feel this) Just being asked was AMAZING! I basked in how cool it was and took BEING PRESENT all in! (That is a VERY important part of the recipe y’all! – You are not truly LIVING if you are not IN THE PRESENT! Living in the PAST is called REMINISING. Living in the FUTURE is called HOPING. Being in the NOW is called LIVING!)

Look up "Fernando Pessoa" on Wikepedia...Amazing Portuguese writer. Here is his statue. They sell Cuban cigars right next door! 😉

Energetically what was happening is that I was sending out wonderful energy and the results just kept pouring in…Next thing I know seven friends, who don’t know each other at all, sent me emails about an Oprah contest for people who want their OWN SHOW. I resisted at first but then it gets pretty CRAZY-OBVIOUS that this is definitely an OMEN when people just kept emailing me that “this is so you”! I decided to confront fear and go for it! But how? I asked friends for help and together we created a rockin’ video entry that got over 30,000 votes in about 11 days! Soooooooo many ButterflyMoms and Dads spread it to their friends, put up posters, took it work, posted it, and voted as many times as they could! We got into six publications including the Boston Globe and Middlesex News and a call from one of major news stations who wanted to do a story. It was simply AMAZING and HUMBLING! I had made plans to spend the summer in Portugal with my girls (as I had done as a child) and decided to go even though I had not heard back from the contest – they were supposed to have an answer by beginning of July…. always follow your heart 🙂

Always follow your heart, huh? Ok, that is all cool and dandy but the heart also gets restless! When I think about all the time I spent on “boyfriends” over the years, morphing into who they wanted me to be so that I would be loved! Let’s just say I wish I had learned my lesson FASTER! 😉 Everything takes its time. Sometimes we try to force things to happen quicker but just like with growing a veggie garden or making a baby, everything has its “GERMINATION” time. 😉 I was again reminded to “let go” and “trust”. Like many others, that is not exactly the message I picked up from my childhood. It is a very important one though, very important! If you are focusing on what you don’t have, more of that will come to you. It’s actually more like, the more you focus on something, the more you only SEE THAT and the “stuff” that you DO WANT virtually disappears. “WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT, YOU SEE MORE OF”….Think about what you like/love/are passionate about. Keep a gratitude journal and write about those things in there. I promise you, you will start SEEING SHIFTS, BIG and small! Stay with it! Invite your friends to join in! Have fun with it!

Six o'clock tea anyone? In front of Castelo Sao Jorge (St. George's Castle)

EVERYTHING you do is leading you somewhere! EVERYTHING! Most of us want to do what we are SUPPOSED to do AND THEN “when”:

-the bills are paid

-I win the lottery

-I get promoted

-I get in shape

-I get a better job

-The kids are older

-The house is paid down

-I pay off my student loans

-I lose weight

-I pay off my credit cards

-I pay for the kids’ college

-I retire…..

THEN! YES! THEN I WILL be happy and do the things I love!……..Rrrrrrrrrrrrright, like that’s how it works! YOU KNOW that’s now how it works but that is how we think when we fall into that HOLE of DESPAIR, mostly seeing the “empty” of our lives and not the “FULLNESS”! See your passions! Talk about them! Dream about them! Write about them! Seek them out and you will see them EVERYWHERE!!!!!

Weeks go by………(tick tock tick tock) Ok, so I was getting restless. I LOVE being here in Portugal and was having (and am having) a GREAT time! It’s just that I wanted to know about the OWN SHOW contest. The expectation was that we would hear by early June. There had been no further announcements and I just wanted to know either way if I was one of the top 40. Again I decided to LET IT GO. Just TRUST that whatever answer would come would come in the right time and that IN THE NOW I would concentrate on TRULY BEING HERE! SOAKING IT ALL IN! I’m on a budget here but I’m having wonderful fun just seeing, smelling, tasting, hearing, feeling the TOTAL EXPERIENCE of BEING in PORTUGAL! The time I stopped writing here was about re-connecting with that!

Well, two days ago I got a call from my studly husband Doug saying that THE OPRAH SHOW had called again! I had put it out of my mind so it totally caught me off guard. The same producer who had called a couple of months ago called again and asked me to send him a new video of the letter I had sent in describing an Oprah episode that had GREATLY helped me from giving up on life when my baby girl Sophia suddenly died in my arms. Each time I tell the story about the show I still cry and get goose bumps. It was VERY powerful show! The producer also said….(drum roll) that Oprah will be watching the clip herself!!!! WOW! NO PRESSURE PEOPLE! He apologized that he needed it by the next day but that he would be editing it. I just needed to send him footage. “PSHAHHHH!!! Not a problem I said hanging up.”

Almost immediately things started going “not as I expected/wished”. It was sooooo much stuff going “wrong” that my (very Catholic) aunt was asking the sky if there was a witch up there. “I certainly hope so,” I responded “because we need all the help we can get!” 😉 The biggest obstacle was the internet connection. My connection was VERY weak and to download each video was going to take almost 9 hours! YIKES! The pressure was building! At first I EFFORTED BIG TIME, but at some point I just LET IT GO, not with frustration but with knowing that I had done the best I could and that my BEST AND HIGHEST GOOD was on its way!

LIFE's REFLECTIONS...

The solution came in the form of a neighbor who heard from another neighbor, who heard from another neighbor who heard from his wife that “D. Olga’s-niece-who-is-visiting-from-America” was having trouble connecting to the internet! IT TAKES A VILLAGE!!! YES IT DOES! The simple solution was that he gave me his security code and I now have a FABULOUS internet connection! With the new connection I was able to send the biggest file in 14 minutes, instead of 9 hours and I can also download my ButterflyMoms blog faster too which means I can write again! YAY!!!!!!!!

I know I wrote a lot today but there are soooo many lessons popping up! Savor your lessons. Most of us get mad at ours but see what happens when you BEFRIEND YOUR LESSONS! They are here to SERVE YOU!

Great big hugs,
Mariaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

🙂

PS Oh and the producer also told me that for the Oprah contest they have not picked their final 40 yet. Practice saying this more in your life: “If it serves my best and highest good, then it will happen at the perfect time.” :)!

PPS If you like what you read:

1. Post it on your FB, Twitter, LinkedIn, etc.

2. Share it with your friends!

MWAH!

Page 1 of 41234
0

Your Cart